I often hear from people what they are looking for in relationship. They want the smart, compassionate, well-equipped and well-mannered guy who has no mental or emotional trauma to work through.
Or they want a man who has a great sense of humor, nice, kind sincere, loyal and passionate and honest who’s going to treat them with love and respect.
Of course it’s easy to desire the perfect man.
Yet many of us are not perfect. We struggle with emotions, wants/desires, external causes that seem insurmountable. All those battles cause imbalances in our commitment and efforts. They also cause us to appear less than perfect.
Is the perfect guy really out there?
As you may have figured out, I study Hermetics with the Modern Mystery School. From this orientation, we first want to take a look at if we’re even asking the right question. Instead of looking for the perfect guy and making many lists to try and identify him when he magically appears before you, why don’t you ask: what is my perfect relationship look like?
You see, when we ask about a guy, we’re looking at personality traits, mental proclivities, behavioral patterns, genetics, etc. When we’re asking about a relationship, well, that’s entirely created by the two people working together.
This reorientation moves us closer to the possibility of achieving the desired experience, because it puts it back into the realm we can control, influence, and direct, and thus our joy and fulfillment increases.
“Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
I believe these words become more true the more you travel. With the perspective that you gain as you travel, you learn to see and experience and transform your perspective. You can only really impact your life and your heart in this way when you’re out of your normal context. This is why I love to travel—it takes me out of my normal context.
Oftentimes we go through life and don’t see the transformative experiences that happen right in front of us because of the context that we’re in. We see ourselves in our normal lives, our normal day, and anything that does not fit into that normality gets filtered out by the brain as unimportant or extraneous or weird.
We miss the sunset because we’re ‘just trying to get home’ or we miss the flowers in the market because ‘there’s no one at home I’m trying to impress.’ So we miss the beautiful and new that’s actually happening right before us.
I often tell my initiates that at first the impact of the lineage on your life is only noticeable by other people. This is because they can see that you have changed between now and the last time they saw you. You’re with yourself every moment of everyday, so you may not catch the subtle differences in attitude or energy level that is so apparent to others.
It’s easier to see the differences those changes are making when there is some time between each experience, but you’ll never have the benefit of that as a self-observer
For you, waking up everyday looking at yourself in the mirror, you only see incrementally changes that don’t look as big, but overtime they add up!
There is beauty in your path and there is beauty in who you are and there’s beauty in the energy that you bring to your life. When you start to see that beauty inside of you then you can actually see that in the people around you, and in the places and in the objects outside of you.
So really everything that we experience outside of us, including the beauty we see, is sourced from within. We just need to bring that out and develop a practice of starting from within to acknowledge our Divinity and acknowledge our beauty and then bring that out into the world, rather than taking what we seem to see in the world outside of us inward, usually an ego-driven desire or reaction of protection or fear.
So it’s time to reverse the flow of your energy instead of taking things from outside and bringing them in, it’s now time to take the beauty and the Eternal nature from within you outward. Why? Because we need you, we need your perspective, we need your divinity expressed. We love you. We need your gifts in the world now more than ever. See you on the path of the Great Work—your own path of Beauty.
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